The official website of Jeff Smith-Luedke, famously know as Azrienoch, is the author of The Perpetual Wound and The Absurdity of Philosophy. He is often found on YouTube and Stickam with username azrienoch. Subscribe to his blog, read his books, watch his videos, and do other fun things with other such paraphernalia.
Obama's Surplus
Monday, 07 September 2009

President Obama, have you noticed that despite explaining what you want to happen, people don't understand? It's because you're too wordy. What you want to say is lost to the ear in a sea of superfluous clauses, tangents, prepositions, an abundance of adverbs, run-on sentences, and other collections of words. I think we can all agree your oratorical talent has diminished since you've taken office. This makes me suspicious of you because wordiness a rookie mistake, and you are not a rookie.

As far as I see it, if you're too wordy, you're either completely untrained in public speaking, or intentionally obfuscating. The only reason I can think of to cripple yourself is so you can say what people want to hear, but ineffectively, so you don't let down your financiers. The people can't say you didn't try, and the companies can't say you took away their money. Well, I don't buy it. I will be saying you didn't try. If you really want what you say you want, you'd use those big, pretty balls of yours and kick your party in the ass. Why are you worried about a bipartisan bill? The people didn't elect president a member of the bipartisan party. Are you afraid of not being reelected in three years? This is a democracy. Only dictators cling to any power they can get. Are you afraid you won't be able to get congress on board with future projects? I think we agree that public healthcare is the most important thing you could do with your presidency, so what have you got to lose—again, unless this is self-sabotage.

Now, if I'm wrong, and your wordiness is just a gigantic mistake on your part, then stop it! Say fewer things. I don't mean say less. There's a difference between talking a lot and being too wordy. For example, instead of talking about being clear about what you're talking about, just be clear. Instead of telling us how very, very important something is to you, to us, to all of us in the blessed United States of America, just tell us why it's important. We understand if you need to pause to think before you speak. You should have been doing that already. Stop diluting your message with messages about your message, and say what you mean. Then you'll have an understanding public and just might get what you want. At least, I think it's what you want. Things get fuzzy around the thirtieth word in a sentence.


 
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